On flies and windows

Last night, when I went to bed, I realised there’s a fly in my bedroom. I intended to read a bit, so I turned on the bedside lamp, which, of course, awoke the fly. It was big and noisy, and immediately started flying around and getting on my nerves. I contemplated trying to chase it out. An activity not without a risk. I’d have to open a window, with light on (otherwise I wouldn’t see the fly), which means potentially attracting more insects rather than getting rid of the one, as it may take an indefinitely long time to convince the fly to leave, which, in fact, may not succeed at all.

After some contemplation I decided not to bother. I wanted to read a little and then sleep, not spend half a night chasing insects around my bedroom. I’d just ignore it, it’d settle down, and next day I wouldn’t even remember. But it kept occasionally flying loops through the room and buzzing like a vuvuzela. And it was huge. So, I got up, opened a window, walked up to where the fly was sat and waved at it with my book. The fly lazily buzzed across the room to the open window and landed on the outer side of its frame. I walked back and closed the window, locking the fly out.

As I was lying down again the thought crossed my mind how quickly and easily the issue got resolved and how it turned out that less than 30 seconds of simplest action saved me from lots of worry and annoyance.

I don’t do this sort of thing often, as usually what I write is meant in a very literal way, but this is one of those allegorically metaphorical posts “based on a true story”. Sometimes you don’t want to build an Incredible Machine, and a complex execution instruction, pondering about side effects and implications. Sometimes, you just want to open your window and wave at the fly with your book. Sometimes, the simple strategy actually works.

9 thoughts on “On flies and windows

    1. Rem Post author

      Well, actually, similar to how a person can get into The Zone, a team can, on a longer time scale, get into a sort of Macro-Zone, where things just flow and mesh and you only ever need to differentiate between “kill stuff” and “kill things” šŸ™‚

  1. Issy

    @theAnorak That always works for me šŸ˜›
    but I actually think he is going to put his sword away, and swat Putricide with a book…

    Rem.. why on earth don’t you have fly screens? šŸ™‚
    Have to admit they are a bit of a pain when it comes to realising that you can’t throw the spider you just captured out of the window.. but at least it means you can have the light on and the window open at night šŸ˜›

    Seriously though
    Swift and decisive action = problem gone = good night’s sleep

    1. Rem Post author

      Ah, three reasons:

      1. Fly screens are always also air screens, sad case of can’t have your cake and eat it too. Although, arguably, “some air” is better than “no air”.

      2. We’re not a high-humidity region, so it’s not, well, vital.

      3. Haven’t thought about it in advance šŸ˜¦

  2. nowiamtree

    I suggest you download the Young Cat Addon. Means you don’t have to get up from where you’re sitting, and it provides you with added extra value amusement.

    1. Rem Post author

      Maybe one day, maybe one day. It’s a tempting thought. Would first have to make my peace with how it conflicts with the Undamaged Furniture Subsystem. And, most importantly, you know my philosophy: I don’t want to take responsibility of a living being unless I know for certain that I can, emotionally, provide it with 100% of what it needs from me.

    2. nowiamtree

      I think you need to install Soditit’sgoingtohappen first, not to mention bolstering your operating system’s defence.

      Frighteningly, I don’t think ANY of my three need me. I simply think they humour me, because they know they get fed good food that way.

    3. Rem Post author

      Ah, you know what I mean! Of course, “need” is a multi-faced beast. Yes, cats can take care of themselves (in normal circumstances). But why would I get one if I wouldn’t want to truly emotionally invest into it?

    4. nowiamtree

      For dealing with flies, spiders and boring moments in life of course!

      I know exactly what you mean though. I remember us having a long conversation about it.

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